You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
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