My first STD was from a foam party
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
