I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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