they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
