so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
