She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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