Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
