how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
