She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
they need to just BURY HIM!
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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