i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize