you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Randomize
