woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
