does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
