Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
