Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
