i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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