People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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