Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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