New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Randomize
