do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
