i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
