I've blown a few things in my day
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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