I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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