i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
In America we eat man semen.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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