Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
