I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
