I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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