Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
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