And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
