The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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