My sheets look like a crime scene.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
