Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
He kissed a someone with a penis
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I got inside last night via doggy door
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