honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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