I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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