I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize