i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
