Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
