She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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