Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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