Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
