I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize