how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
