guys are not supposed to queef...right?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
