i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
