Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
