Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
you guys were way drunker than both of me
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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