Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Randomize
