I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
i just google imaged poop.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
