You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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