talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
